As you can probably tell, it has been quite a while since I have been active on my blog and to be perfectly honest with you, I thought it had reached a time where it had come to a natural end.

Although we are still fighting to get Boo everything he needs to live as much of an independent and quality life as possible, he has reached an age now where he prefers I don’t go into as much detail publicly and I fully respect iq option x that choice.

I have kept the blog active but have not been present on any of my social media accounts etc and have recently been trying to decide whether or not to deactivate them all.

And then things changed.


We are about to embark on yet another journey of discovery with Squidge.
She has been having a range of issues for a while now and it has reached a point where we are having to seek medical guidance in the hope of obtaining a diagnosis and the ability to help and support her as much as we can.

This has already led to many hours of frustration at how the system works and we have been unfortunate enough to suffer errors by medical teams, poor communication, several hospital admissions, and much more.
And that’s just the last few months!

I will share more details on the medical side of things in a future post but having to go through all of this again has made me realise that I am not ready to stop sharing our journey with you all.
If my sharing the difficulties we face iqoption x on a day to day basis can help just 1 person then to me, it is worth it!

Missy x

Eventually, as a parent, we reach a point where we just aren't needed quite as much as before.

Don't get me wrong, our children will always need us no matter how old they are but their needs change and evolve into something less physical as they become more and more independent and determined to find their own path.

Although my youngest is only 5 years old he is at full-time school now and growing up at a scarily fast rate.  

I have spent so many years raising babies and always putting my needs last on the list that it feels quite odd to me to have free time during the day and for the demands of parenting to be gradually becoming less and less.  
Regardless of their age I will always make myself available to my children whenever they need me but recently I have found myself in a position where I have a chance to find out who I am again iq option x apk outside of being 'Mummy' and I have to admit that it couldn't have come at a better time.

Over the last few months, I have been feeling as though I have been losing my identity.

It goes without saying that I love my children more than life itself and would do anything to see them happy but I was beginning to feel trapped and unappreciated.  The demands were constant and exhausting and I was beginning to resent the fact that my children will only let me do things for them and will refuse their father.  I was becoming short tempered and withdrawn.

Trust me when I say I am not proud of feeling that way, in fact, I am almost ashamed to admit it, but those feelings were there and they were very real.

Being a parent can be extremely lonely, even more so when you are raising a child with additional needs and face daily challenges that most people are completely unaware of.

I often hear things said like "Well, you chose to become a parent and stay home to raise them" 
or 
"It was your choice to have 6 children so now you just have to deal with it".

Yes, it was my choice and it is a choice that I will never regret but I also feel that we should ALL be able to be open and honest about our feelings without having to worry about any backlash that we may face as a result of that honesty.

I believe I was very close to becoming depressed, and that depression is more common than we realise for stay-at-home parents.

Photo by Anh Nguyen on Unsplash

Having children is a privilege but it also incredibly hard work.  
It is a 24-hour job with no holiday allowance and little appreciation along the way.

I'm sure there are many people who would say that having children is a reward in itself but realistically it is very often a thankless task.

It is a journey that I love being a part of, but also have conflicting feelings towards.

A big part of helping myself has been being honest about the way I was feeling.  Honest to myself as well as to my husband.  
And now I am sharing that honesty with you too.

It became apparent that I need to start making some changes, making time for myself and doing something that isn't children or household orientated, and so I have taken a part-time job.  
Just a few hours on the weekend that will enable me to get out of the house and be Missy instead of Mummy.  
I'm not saying that this is going to solve everything overnight, but I am already feeling more positive about things.

But life is a double-edged sword.

As I sit here writing this and getting ready to put it 'out there' I feel guilt, shame and embarrassment alongside the positive feelings I have about encouraging people to be open and honest about their own realities.

I am worried about the response this post will get; about people's reactions to my honesty.

But mostly I am worried about being judged.

And herein lies the problem.  

The biggest reason why so many people suffer in silence, many to the point where their feelings become all-consuming and overwhelming;

Judgement.

We are all afraid of being judged to some extent, but that fear increases with the knowledge that we aren't quite as perfect and happy as our outward appearance may make us seem and that we need to admit it so that we can get the help we need.

So, I am writing this post and sharing my own honesty and fear in the hope that it will encourage others to do the same.


Please don't suffer in silence!

Even if you feel (as I did) that your problems are insignificant and trivial compared to others'.

It's okay not to be okay.

It's okay to be afraid.

It's okay to admit that you aren't happy 100% of the time.

And most of all ..... it IS okay to admit you are struggling and to ask for help.


Missy x

This summer CJ has signed up for a 3-week course with the National Citizen Service (NCS) where she will get to take part in a week of adventurous activities, a week of living on a university campus and then she will help to coordinate and complete a project in our local community that will be beneficial to its residents.

She found out about NCS, a government-backed programme, through her school and jumped at the chance to take part. 

NCS is open to 16 and 17 year olds across England and Northern Ireland who are able to complete a two to four week programme during their school holidays, including outdoor team building exercises designed to put them through their paces and take them out of their comfort zone whilst having fun, a residential stay where they can learn 'life skills' and responsibility, a community-based social action project where they can develop leadership skills and connect with their communities, and an end of programme celebration event.



CJ has already started mapping out her future and is extremely focused when it comes to her studies. 
I couldn't be any prouder of her and her incredible ambition and this course with NCS will give her the perfect opportunity to have some fun after completing her GCSE's, as well as experiencing what it will be like to live on a university campus and being completely independent and responsible for her own survival.

It's pretty scary to think that we are only a few short years away from that scenario and anything that will help to build her confidence is very welcome.

She is really looking forward to experiencing all of this with some of her friends from school but also about making new friends along the way; something which she has already been able to do at a pizza and quiz night which was hosted by NCS for that exact reason.

Another great thing about NCS is that they offer several different dates for each course, so even if you already have plans for your summer they will do their very best to accommodate your child.

It is easy to see why more than 100,000 teenagers, from many different backgrounds, will be coming together in common purpose with NCS this year.

By breaking down barriers and bringing together teenagers from different backgrounds NCS are encouraging them to strive to be better adults; to be more accepting of the people around them and to be prepared to tackle any challenges that come their way in the future.


I'm starting to wish NCS had been around when I was a teen!


There are still places available for year 11's to take part in this once in a lifetime opportunity this summer.
To sign up now, go to the NCS WEBSITE.


You can also find out more by visiting NCS on FACEBOOK, TWITTER and INSTAGRAM


Missy x




This is a paid collaboration in conjunction with National Citizen Service (NCS) and Tots100.
All opinions are my own.

As a parent things are constantly changing.